Life is unfair,
Nobody sat us down to really tell us that when we were growing up.
In fact, they even sought to protect us from the truth. Especially the parents who go “my children must not suffer the same things I suffered!”
Life is unfair, it doesn't move as linearly as we expect. If we had known, we wouldn't have set some “ridiculous” goals like “get married at 22” or “be a master's holder at 23”.
Are those goals REALLY ridiculous? Not really!
But life do be throwing us curve balls sometimes and the way we eventually turn out is largely dependent on how EQUIPPED we are to handle life.
I'll tell you a small story from my life that just clealy breaks this down. I used to be, not necessarily a tomboy, just an overactive little girlie.
I went band for band with the boys! Participated in ALL the games! We were racing against each other m, playing war games and football together and I was prolly just as aggressive (it not as strong😭)
But what that did was it got me into a lot of scrapes. I was always bleeding and nursing one injury or the other.
Good thing, I had a father who was a doctor and had a well stocked first aid box. The bad thing was mans is a missionary so he wasn't always home.
Which means that if I got wounded when he wasn't home, I'd be in TROUBLE!
UNLESS, he showed me how to care for my wounds MYSELF. So he did and thereafter, I was able to get out the first aid box and treat myself.
Where am I going with this?
There's a whole lot of things our parents handled for us as kids!
They paid our school fees and handled all our financial needs and issues,
Soothed us when we cried,
Collected our biscuit back for us when some bully took it
Got us treated when we fell sick,
Either encouraged or beat us down when we failed (depending on the kind of parents you had)
Told us to get up and fix our face when we were seeing shege and go depressed! (If you had a typical Nigerian parent).
But now we're growing up and they're chilling on all the taking responsibility for us whether because they are no longer with us or things got tougher for them.
Unfortunately, no one taught us how to take over. It's either we're so naive we have no idea how our parents did it or we got some very bad models from them that won't serve us.
Now life is coming at us but we have NO IDEA what to do or how to handle it and that can be super scary.
I remember when I realized that I'd have to handle my financial responsibility myself. Those were really scary times.
Some of you are in my DM s wondering how to pick a course to study in the university.
You're about to graduate from the university but you din know one thing about getting jobs or making money
Now when Lagbaja breaks our heart, we have no idea how to handle it. And so on and so forth
I'll tell you for free that my ability to face down emotional upheaval came from books I ACCIDENTALLY stumbled upon and of course, I think, from the DELIBERATE spiritual training I received from my dad.
The knowledge I have about BUILDING WEALTH and DEPLOYING PURPOSE came mostly from my training in The Cave.
My pastors took copious amounts of time to train me on spiritual warfare when “the ancestors” came for me. Sometimes we genZs forget that the spiritual realm is real and part of it is hostile and so our struggles aren't merely physical.
But anyway, the list goes on and on.
THIS is the point. I have some bad news for you;
Ya NOT gonna figure out life ON YOUR OWN.
Not if you want a really good life and everyone around you does NOT have what you want.
If they do, congratulations, ask them to show you how.
But I also have some good news for you; You CAN figure out life with the right information and training from people heading down a similar path or who have already lived that life. Not by just admiring or envying them from afar
But by getting close enough for them to guide you either by pattern or by training.
Hennyway, if your problem right now is that you have no idea what to do with your life, or you do, but are asking, “ HOW DO I EVEN START?”
I am having a conversation around that with the exceptional Cecilia, Oluwajumilo, a badass influencer I really respect and the founder of The Porter’s Clan on the 20th of this month, June.
If it's about STARTING WELL on your path to GROWTH, PURPOSE FULFILLMENT and WEALTH BUILDING, you want to sit down with us too,
Click the link to join over a thousand people already seated.
See you there!